Some might ask, "what qualifications do you have to blog?" To which I would respond, "None. BUT I did change 10 poopy diapers yesterday and that was just between 2 of my kids!" Thank God my oldest is potty trained and knows how to wipe his own ass. That alone makes me smile but more than that is when I say to my 2 year old, "you are stinky and need to poop in the toilet" and of course I top that off with, "well, let's take a look", as I open up the diaper. Naturally he responds, with his big blue eyes mind you, "yeah, it's diarrhea....." Gee thanks! For some reason that made me smile as well. Maybe it is his quirky and Innocent personality or maybe it was his facial expression. He knows I loathe the poopy diapers and I am fairly confident he does this to me on purpose.
Well, moving on.......right now I sit in the noise that I call silence. Yes I understand that to some of you this saying is backwards but in this house silence truly is golden and it doesn't happen often so when it does, I don't know how to handle it. Take this evening at dinner for example. It is like any other night during dinner where one kid tries to up the other by playing the, "let's see who can be louder" game. Except tonight Max was chanting something so odd I wondered if he was speaking in tongues. The angry face didn't help ease my mind either. I am going to sleep with one eye open for sure. Especially because he will inevitably end up in my bed at some point tonight. That is his new game. I am not sure what the prize is though because I am losing (more than just sleep!) and he must be winning because he keeps coming back! Why? Does anyone know why?
Oh but it isn't just always bodily functions and lack of sleep in my house.....daily we have to clean the food off just about every square inch of every surface in the house. Why wouldn't you dump a bowl full of cereal on the floor? OR wipe PB&J on your shirt and in your hair? Better yet, why wouldn't you stick a bead up your nose?! Now, for many of you this is a repeat story but I bring it up tonight because the bill came in the mail. You see roughly a month ago my oldest (4 years old) starts sneezing and screaming, at 9:30 at night. After 10 minutes he admits he shoved a bead up his nose and let's me have a look. After a long screaming match and many unsuccessful attempts with a pair of tweezers, it was decided there was only one thing to do. At 10pm my husband brought C up to Woodwinds to have a bead removed from his nose. Trust me, we pulled out all the stops, I even held the un-blocked nostril closed while my husband took a large breath into C's mouth to push the bead out that way. No such luck. It was 2 weeks ago that I received a phone call at work from my husband to tell me how much that trip to bead removal junction cost us. I clearly misunderstood him because I dropped my jaw today when I came home from work to the actual bill. I do not throw this number out for any other reason than to validate my previous post of you can not make this up.........$600 for a bead up the nose and a trip to the hospital to have it extracted. Clearly the kid needs a new hobby!
Speaking of hobbies....when I was pregnant with my 3rd (and yes, last) child my husband and I went out to dinner. Keep in mind I was days away from giving birth, 4 days to be exact. The gentleman at the table next to us decided to strike up a conversation with my husband while I left the table to use the restroom. I am unsure as to what they were talking about when I was gone but when I returned the man asked me if I was excited for the birth of my first child. I smiled and said, "actually this is our third". He looks at my husband and replies, "you need a new hobby!". I laughed. Yes, sir we do - preferably one less expensive. I guess I see where my son gets his expensive taste from :)
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